I have never known a time when my fantasies did not include some form of submission on my part. Even my teddy bears played D/s games. Yet, it was not until about three and a half years ago that I finally began to piece together all of the parts that had made up the puzzle of my sexual proclivities.
In truth, I do not particularly enjoy direct pain (although, I must admit how much I love the soreness that, if I am lucky, lasts for days after). Nevertheless, I am thrilled by the thought that my pain could be satisfying for the man who is dominating me. By this same token, I am not particularly motivated by humiliation. Nevertheless, if the man that I am with can exude true confidence and power, then I can find contentment in those moments in which I am small.
I am, at my core, a true submissive. My greatest sense of fulfillment comes through the pleasure or pain that my dominant confers upon me—assuming that through my pain or pleasure, he derives enjoyment.
Most of the people that have known me throughout my life are initially surprised when I share this side with them. I am a strong, sassy, smart-ass woman most of the time. I am a leader in my community. I do not ask much of the people around me. I am more often the support than the supported.
Throughout these last three years, I have learned to revel in the two sides of my persona. To love my power as well as my powerlessness. To bask in both my sass as well as my submission. To nourish the needs of my mind & body, of my heart & soul.
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My Ideal Person:
You should be able to take control-even through email-with out being a jerk about it. If you are simply looking for a quick fling, I am not for you. On the other hand, if you are looking for an instant monogamous, 24/7 full-on relationship, I am certainly not for you.
Be able to ask questions...other than "can I have a picture?" and "what's your favorite position?" Be able to form complete sentences with appropriate punctuation and little to no egregious spelling mistakes. Teach me a new word and I will be putty in your hands.
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