My Ideal Person:
Ideal person would be a practicing Catholic or a Christian. Someone who would be able to control his sexual desires, for fun, whatever, enough to respect the boundaries that need to be observed when a) you're the one who's married and your "friend" isn't, and/or b) the woman to be disciplined does not want sex under any shape or form but would benefit from the "gift" that one's masculinity brings to her, the male voice, the strong hand adminstering discipline, helping make sure that daily task are observed.
Originally joined this group and others out of frustration in self management. To a large degree, and to my self-knowledge at the time, inner management kind of got tangled up due to a decrease in motivation as a result of a head injury incurred in a car accident 33 years ago right now. As time progressed I came to realize and understand that it also appeared that I was trying to "fill in" a father gap that I didn't know was "that" empty. Keep in mind that my biological father is well and alive, but not having grown up with him, due to parent's divorce at toddler age, there have been gaps, especially after stepfather's death in accident in 1979.

No man will be able to replace fully the years lost in my real father's lack of contact but a male parental figure would be helpful to have. Self-care, as in eating three meals a day, brushing and flossing, getting to bed at a decent time, limiting Internet time, etc... are works in progress still, that, in spite of everything have "improved". This is not the typical "profile" to be found on alt I know but this is the "background" that I came with when I joined. No, I was not spanked as a child on a regular basis. Discovered in my late thirties I think, that my brother and I had been spanked by a babysitter, while we were growing up in southern Spain. No, I do not, I stress, "enjoy" spanking but "discovered" through it a "hole" for being "cared for" by a man. Was quite a surprise for me too. Have had a previous disciplinarian on this site who, from what I understand had to change "life" plans, work amongst others. Still miss him and think about him. Anyways this is it for now.

Update: Former disciplinarian recently reconnected about four months ago. I don't know how often he's going to be able to check up on me due to his personal situation as well as job but for now a big gap has been filled. Let's say that I'm not "looking" right now.